Soulmates

I came across this really nice blog about soul mates. She wrote: “Soul mates do exist. That there is truly someone made for you. But it’s up to you to make a choice. We may meet our soul mate by chance but loving and staying with our soul mate is still a choice we have to make..”

I believe in soul mates. In fact, I believe that I already met him. I realized that the moment we had our first conversation. First, I was making pa-cute to him but when we got to talk, I got totally engrossed with him: his face, his views in life, his “hirits”. God, he was perfect. Well, like they say, nobody’s perfect, until you fall in love with them. And maybe that’s what happened, I dunno.

My soul mate and I could talk for hours about anything: his goals, my goals, our friends, our family, “chismis” and other random stuff. We could also be somewhere, sitting or lying around and not saying anything, still it felt like we’re having the time of our lives. We have this romantic and comic bond that some couples envy. We enjoyed simple things. To all those who know me, that’s pretty big. I, who cannot eat “isaw” in the streets and who only drinks mineral water, found myself enjoying eating bread called “putok” with cheese whiz and sipping a plastic of sprite, sitting on a street curb in front of a bakery “sa kanto”. When I told my friends, they said that if my mom & dad saw me, they’d probably have a heart attack hehe. And he, the One-Time-Anti-Havaianas-Critic who would almost condemn me for the number of my Havaianas at home and who would always say “Asus! Mas gusto ko pa Spartan ko dyan!”, would now own a pair (which he wears everywhere) and is requesting ANOTHER ONE for his birthday! We learned a lot from each other. Before I met him, all I knew was new clothes, parties and shallow stuff. Now, I think twice before spending. I do not need expensive gimiks to enjoy. On the other hand, I taught him to, you know, once in a while, enjoy the fruits of his labor J.

For a while then, bliss was on our side. I could say those were my happiest days. I never felt so alive and happy before that. Unfortunately for us, timing wasn’t on our side. External stuff affected what we had. Things that at first we didn’t want to consider but now we felt are taking its toll on us. We didn’t know how to cope with it, much less fix it. That was when we separated. It was painful especially knowing that you have already found him. I didn’t want to let go but as the fucking cliché goes, “you have to let go, if he’s yours he’ll come back, if he’s doesn’t, he never was in the first place.”

We still see each other once in a while nowadays. One can never deny the chemistry that is still there between us. I try hard to fight it. I try hard not to hug him and bury my face in his neck to whisper, “Gago ka! You’re my freaking soul mate! Come on, I wanna start all over again. We can do things right this time around. Promise, I’ll never buy another Havaianas if it bothers you so (crossed fingers!).” But no, I see that he’s doing fine, my pride cannot take what my heart wants me to do. I just allow myself to be secretly “kilig” when sometimes I catch him looking at me like he once did.

With all these, the above blog was right. It’s always a choice. Destiny could always shove your soul mate to your face but it’s always you guys who decide if you would stay together.